Big news out of last night's VMAs, peoples: Beyoncé is a baby mama-to-be! Which totally explains why I'm detecting even more glowiness to her skin than usual. Between that and her rad side-pony and the bright orange Lanvin dress, there's no question she stole the show.
And you know who is probably not happy about it? Katy Perry. Ever since photos leaked of her new hair colour—which her colourist, Rita Hazan, confirmed to be lavender, not pink—I've been waiting for a proper reveal instead of that scraped-back bun we saw with the backdrop of a gas station. And now it has arrived, and I'm disappointed. The contrast of Beyoncé looking all kinds of gorgeous doesn't help.
Come see what I mean—plus check out the rest of the red carpet-walkin' celebs...
Beyoncé is sporting a rad side pony
This woman always looks good, but I think we can all agree that she was EXTRA-good last night. I like the way she played this with low-key hair and makeup—a smart move considering music industry awards ceremonies are rife with over-the-top beauty offenses (we'll get to Nicki Minaj momentarily). Her side pony is the side pony of my dreams, all soft and slightly wavy and dipping ever so slightly over one eye.
Katy Perry is becoming a cartoon character
So here we have it, folks. The lavender hair the way we were meant to see it. I don't know if her whole get-up (including parasol!) is throwing me off, but I'm not digging this. At all. Maybe I'd feel differently if she decided to dress like a 26-year-old instead of, well, a six-year-old. And maybe I'd be more keen on it if it was a little bit longer and looser instead of this very contrived-looking wavy bob. But the combination of it all is just not good. Here's a tip for Katy: try to study Gwen Stefani. Even though Gwen did the cutesy Harajuku thing, she always managed to look powerful and stylish instead of juvenile. It's been so long since we've seen a sexy Katy Perry and I miss her.
When did Katie Holmes become this smokin' hot?
Okay, Tom Cruise. You stole Katie's pretty and now it's back—for maybe the first time in what, five years? I can't get over how good she looks here. Sure, we've been seeing a slow return of the Katie we once knew... but this is the first time in a long time that I've seen her go for such a sexy look on the red carpet. The hair is especially good, as is the makeup—a sophisto neutrals palette with emphasis on the eyes. Well done!
Kim Kardashian tries purple eyeshadow with those spidery lashes
So Kim has returned from her honeymoon in Europe (it was only five days; gotta get back to "work" and walk the red carpet, dontcha know?). I already miss the wedding makeup. Although I suppose Kim should get some sort of recognition for trying something new with this purple eyeshadow. I'm just not sure it requires so many false eyelashes. When I said spidery lashes were in for fall '11, I didn't mean like this.
Selena Gomez continues to look adorable (what else is new?)
Selena is so cute, I can't stand it. Of particular interest here is the eye makeup. See how she's lined the waterlines all the way around the eyes and done an extra bit of smudginess at the outer corners? But the lids are still neutral with just gold shadow? That, along with the rosy cheeks and lip gloss, keeps the look fresh and age-appropriate. Plus, her eyelashes are long but not TOO long. Kim, take note.
Britney Spears cleans up well
Goodness, Brit's hair is looking pretty decent now, isn't it? I'm sure it's extensions, but I wonder how long her actual hair is? I would still prefer it a bit less Playboy blonde, but it's not bad at all. Good makeup, too.
Zoe Saldana needs some lipstick
Did I just write that Zoe Saldana never gets it wrong? Why yes, I did. But I'm going to have to retract that statement—at least partially—because I think this look is lacking in the lip department. Sure, the eye makeup is beautiful, and her skin is out-of-this-world radiant, but her lips just look dry and washed out. I yearn for some gloss or a subtle nude or pink shade... just SOMETHING.
Miley Cyrus shouldn't wear her hair up
There are some people—and I suspect I am one of them—who really shouldn't wear their hair up outside of their homes or, if necessary, trips to the gym. Miley Cyrus is a great example. It's not that she doesn't have a pretty face, but there's something about it—maybe a baby-face quality?—that requires it to be surrounded by more hair. Do you see what I mean? The other issue I have is that the eyelashes are too long, but that seems to be a recurring theme.
Demi Lovato demonstrates why Ombré is over
Where do I even start on this one? Easily the worst look of the night in my book. I mean, COME ON, Demi. This hairstyle is Paris Hilton circa 2003, and it didn't even look good then. I don't know why people insist on curling the ends of their extensions like this—it just looks so unnatural and Barbie-like. Real hair doesn't fall that way. And then there is the whole Ombré thing. I know lots of you still love it but if anything spells the end of the trend, this is it.
Snooki looks good here (for her)
Yeah, I said it. This is still all kinds of wrong, but she looks better than we've seen maybe ever before. I don't know why because if I look at all the individual things, they are as horrifying as ever. Garish eye makeup... frosty balayage... body glitter... long, square nails. (And people ask me why I don't embrace nail art!) But there's a sophistication to our Snooki now that I have to praise here. I feel like she's so close to getting it right, you know?
Vanessa Hudgens goes for a 1920s look; I don't like it
Vanessa Hudgens does beauty editors proud a lot of the time. She had a fantastic top knot once, and when she lost the extensions I think we all rejoiced. I see what she's trying to do here with this flapper-inspired hair and makeup, and I applaud her for trying something different... but I just don't like it. The heavy makeup and stiff hairstyle is aging her.
There are no words for Nicki Minaj
I do kind of like the turquoise eye makeup, though.
Which VMA beauty look was your fave?
Which one disappointed you the most?
Are you excited for a baby Beyoncé?